So what does it mean to Dream Bigger? Well….first you have to dream before you can start to dream bigger, and I am not sure when I started to dream. Most likely, it was when I would get questions from adults asking “what do you want to be when you grow up?”, and I had no idea. This was probably because I really didn’t want to grow up! However, things would soon change.
A Little Background
I am the oldest of 4 with a brother and 2 sisters. But in many ways it is like two different families. You see, my brother and I are 2 years apart. Then there is a 6 year gap before my sisters came along, and they are 16 months apart. Everyone called them the “little girls”. (FYI, they hated that). But during that 6 year gap, my parents took in foster kids. Actually, not kids, but babies. Very. Young. Babies. A total of 12 during those 6 years. The most we had at any one time were a 1 year old toddler and a set of newborn twins.
My mother also liked to sew. And when they moved on, every foster baby got their very own teddy bear hand-made by my mother. However, that is an entirely different story. I did not realize it at the time, but I probably felt that my parents were looking for some better, replacement kids. Or it was simply the fact that my mother had been adopted. Nonetheless, I did not dream of having children when I grew up because babies were just too much work and no fun.
Mom could Dream Bigger
In spite of all the work of taking care of babies (and her sewing), my mother was still able to dream. I am not sure when it started because I was only in elementary school. But she wanted an A-frame house. Now A-frames are typically summer cottages, not 3-4 bedroom “raise your family in them” houses. So my parents found an architect who was able to design the A-frame that my mother wanted. We moved into that house in 1965, and it quickly became well known within the area. In fact, many people had heard of The A-Frame. Random people would be out on their Sunday drive, and just stop by and ask to see the house. One year it was even featured on the local “Parade of Homes”.
So that was my first introduction to what happens when you can achieve one of your big dreams. It was really kinda cool!
More Early Dreams…..
Many of my early dreams involved sports, which was unfortunate for girls growing up at that time. Remember, this was in the mid to late 60’s, before girls sports were big. In fact, Title IX did not come along until 1972, and that opened the doors to significant opportunities for women in sports. In addition, my dad’s mother, a.k.a “Grandma, the dream killer” did not think “little ladies” (boy I hated that), should participate in sports. Unfortunately for me, I was the first granddaughter after she had 3 sons and 2 grandsons. Unlucky for me, because I really liked sports. One time, Mom bought me a football when Grandma was visiting. Needless to say, it did not go over well. (Gory details omitted).
It was also tough growing up as a sports fan with a totally non-sports father and only one brother. My brother did play little league baseball for one year. I remember being mad at him when he quit, because I just wanted to play! As for dad, there were no easy father’s day gifts for him like golf balls, and any sport I watched I had to explain the rules to him. That is IF I actually got to watch any sports with only ONE TV in the house.
Starting to Dream Bigger
By the time I got to high school, my parents had divorced. I was suddenly the “other” adult (at 13) in the household, and spent a lot of time helping my mother, and taking care of my younger sisters. In fact, I had to be home in time for them to get off the bus, and then it was my job to make dinner. Somehow I did manage to play volleyball, basketball, and softball in high school. Basketball was always my favorite, with softball a close second.
I loved sports so much, when I went to college I decided to study Physical Education. At that time, it was pretty much teaching gym class in schools, and/or coaching high school teams. Today, there are so many more options. So….fast forward 3 years and I have a job working with kids after school. They. Drove. Me. Nuts. Ok, now what?
However, my real dream was to be a professional athlete! I then began to realize that the only professional sports for women were Golf and Tennis, but at that time I was not playing either sport. Hmmm. This could be a problem. So, I could start playing Tennis and see where that got me. Boom! Another realization hit that most of the Tennis pros at that time had started playing very early in life, some as early as 4 years old. AND they had the full support of their parents who would take them everywhere. KaBoom!! Not going to happen in my life. However, I did later play tennis and achieve a local USTA #1 ranking in Women’s over 35 singles for 2 straight years.
Change of Plans
Between the realization that the kids drove me nuts, and I was likely too old already to be a professional athlete, I decided to change majors! Somewhere along the way after my parents divorced, I remember telling myself to “always make sure you can take care of yourself”. This came from watching Mom struggle as a single parent with 4 children, and Dad being dad. It quickly became a dream/goal to make sure I was NEVER dependent on anyone, especially financially. So I switched my major to Accounting, so I would have a good solid business degree and allow me to support myself.
Finally, University of Akron, B.S. Accounting! Even took the CPA exam. Unfortunately, I only passed one part. Funny! But I never worked as an accountant. I actually started out as a Computer Programmer Trainee working in COBOL on IBM Mainframe computers.
Finally Living the Dream… or was I?
So now what? I have a good job. Out on my own. Playing competitive softball during the summer. You know, tournaments almost every weekend from Memorial Day to Labor Day. I even started running. Entered my first race, just a 5K. Somehow I managed to win my age group with a time of 24:18. So I keep running. Ok. I was not a professional athlete, but I was accomplishing things!
My career started to grow. I got a new job, and I got to travel for work!!! Cool. I have always loved to travel, it was a dream of mine to see all 50 states! I figured that would keep me going for a while. After a while, it was time for the “American Dream”. You know the one, where you own your own home! Well, actually the bank owns it, but you get the idea. So I started looking for a house. It did not take long to find one that “felt right”. As it turned out, it had an eerily similar layout (minus the basement) to the same house we lived in when I was in kindergarten. Wow! No wonder it “felt” right. I moved into that “starter” house in 1988, and I am about to start another round of renovations on that same house 34 years later!
My first house….and a bigger dream!
I have always loved doing the work myself. You see, when we built the A-Frame, my parents had done a lot of the work themselves to keep the cost down. So I watched that, and even helped.
Therefore, when I got my own house, this was nothing new. I love this type of stuff, and this time it was my own house! Some of the highlights over the years included:
- Installing my first garage door opener, by myself, with a cast on one arm. The real goal was to get it installed. My help did not show up that day! (Refer to the previous dream to always be able to take care of myself).
- Converting a mud room into a laundry room, and moving it from the kitchen, including the wiring and plumbing.
- Remodeling the kitchen, after gutting it down to the studs, I also moved some doorways, and added a wall. Plumbing, electrical, and I even added circuits into the main electrical panel. The cabinets, linoleum floor, and windows were done for me, but I did everything else.
- After two rounds of scraping and painting the outside, I finally went with vinyl siding. Yup! Did that myself too. FYI. You meet a lot of your neighbors that way!
- The next big project was to gut the bathroom, tub and everything to the studs. Again – did that project too! However, I did have a little help getting the old bathtub out…..
As I was doing all of this, I then began to dream of buying land and actually designing and building my house. Including doing as much of the work myself as I could! I thought I was really dreaming bigger!!!
Then “Dream Bigger” totally changed!
Well, the very next year after I finished the bathroom, life totally changed. I was on my way to work one day, only I did not get there. Oncoming car. 55 mph. Two lane road. Driver fell asleep at the wheel. Two weeks in the hospital. Two months in a nursing home. Shattered ankle on one side, broken femur, broken hip, broken arm on the other side. Oh. It was my dominant arm, too! No head or internal injuries, but non-weight bearing for 5 months, and a LONG rehab (More details here).
Just a few years later, I was down-sized at work. So my big dreams took another hit! Hey – at least there were no injuries this time! Well, except for the economy. It was not doing well at this time. Anyway, I was out of work for over two years. But there was a silver lining. I went back to school and got a Master’s degree. More importantly, I got a taste of what retirement might be like, at least in terms of having my time. Financially, not so much. Fortunately, the Master’s degree helped me get back into the workplace, but this time in a contracting role. Now I had to replenish my funds so I could eventually retire.
The other part of the silver lining was that I started back to the gym to continue to rebuild my strength after the accident. At that point my dream was just to regain the strength I had before the accident. However, like many other dreams, it grew much bigger.
Dream Bigger needs a revision!
I have totally come to realize that, if not for the GRACE OF GOD, I would not be alive! Boy, that really changes your perspective on life. I also believe that, if you are still here, then God is not done with you. This also means that there is something He needs you to do. I have already achieved some big dreams:
- I recovered from the car accident and have run 9 half-marathons.
- In 2018, I went to Alaska and finally visited all 50 states.
- I finished my family care-giving duties, and have settled Mom’s estate, so now my life is mine!
- AND….Just last month I retired after over 40 years as a software engineer. I feel like I was wandering in the wilderness for 40 years, and have finally reached the promised land – RETIREMENT!
However, I also know there is more for me to do.
Dream Even Bigger!
I know God has big plans for each of us, but are we willing to step up and dream really big? And are we willing to trust Him for the outcome? Am I?
As I have learned many times, dreams can, and should change. So here are the dreams I currently have:
- I want to optimize my health and fitness to the best it can be. It will require hard work and changes so I can stay active and independent. Fortunately, I have access to some incredible products to help achieve this. This is actually the “dream smaller” part of Dreaming Bigger. But it will be a BIG task!
- Run a half marathon in under 2:15:00.
- To participate in a half ironman and finish within the time limit of 8:30:00.
- Update and expand my garage to include a workshop, so I can get back to woodworking. I also want to get a bandsaw and a planer!
- Start a small business to build an sell wooden crosses, and other small items.
- Buy houses and fix them up, then either sell or rent them.
- Continue to inspire and encourage others. I have been told many times since my accident that I have inspired someone. Who me? I guess that is why I need to dream bigger!
- To have the ability to respond abundantly when there is a need in the church. The first item will be to write a check for $75,000 to repave the church parking lot when it is needed in a couple of years.
- I want a totally abundant retirement. This includes the financial freedom to make decisions and not have to worry about the cost. This includes living debt free.
- Travel when and where I want, and be able to take friends along if I choose, and to travel in style. Most likely it will be a motor home that can pull a car to travel around the country. I also want to visit Australia and New Zealand. I want to go back to Germany and visit the Neuschwanstein castle. This is the castle that Cinderella’s castle at Disney World is modelled after. While I am there, I also want to see Austria and Switzerland.
- To never have to dress up again!!! I have always hated that. I would rather use my money for other things.
Do you have big dreams too?
I also want to continue to learn and grow as a professional marketer, so that I can reach these dreams. And then DREAM EVEN BIGGER! However, even if I never reach my dreams, I am thankful that I have been very blessed!
People say: WHAT IF I FAIL? But the better question to ask is: WHAT IF I SUCCEED?
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